Hi Lucia,
I’ve been reading your posts and can really relate to the struggle going on in your head. Thank goodness it was a nightmare and not reality for you. Sometimes our dreams can seem so real (and then stay in our heads the next day).
Have you considered exploring ‘Mindfulness’ options? The Mindfulness ‘blog’ (I’m really bad at computer terminology) is at the bottom of the forum front page (told you I’m not good at describing this).
As I see it, MM’s book covers what we eat (and recipes), exercise and mindfulness. I’ve found mindfulness meditation helpful and for me it’s a major assistance on my BSD journey.
I hope the ‘brolly’ you’re holding up to get through this ‘shower’ is bright yellow…….same colour as the the sunshine and one of the colours of the rainbow that comes with the sunshine! Best wishes.