Hi – I first found out I had blood sugars which were pre-diabetic a couple of years ago and read ‘The Diabetes Code, started intermittently fasting and cutting down drastically on carbs. (This is the first time I have discovered this forum though.) . I lost four stone and lowered my blood sugars to well within a normal range.

I have since slipped back into bad habits, my weight has gone back up (not completely but on the way to where I was at the start) and my fasting bloods are currently high pre-diabetic. I am so cross and disappointed in myself.

My questions if anyone has the time to consider them are these:

Have I caused more damage by going in and out and then back into this than if I hadn’t started it at all?

Does anyone have any ideas on how to cope with it when your partner has similar issues – significantly overweight with a visceral fat pattern – but really doesn’t want to join you in tackling them? I do know it is my responsibility entirely to make this work for me and no one else’s fault if it doesn’t. However, it makes it so much harder, Eg to plan meals and control what food comes into the house, resist temptations.

I also find following these principles has taken away some of the good things we share and enjoy together (centring around cooking, eating out, entertaining), leaving a bit of a void which feels difficult to fix.

I haven’t told him I am going back into this yet but I know his heart will sink when I do. I guess it’s eating codependency. He doesn’t try to create barriers to me doing this as such but detaches, doesn’t want to engage with it and reacts by making sure even more carb food is available at home for him in an anxious way – and then the shutters go down in a defensive way. I don’t want to damage our relationship but I would love to find a way to make this easier. I would love to know if anyone has any experience and advice on this issue.

Lastly – Are there any other newbies who would like to join a thread to support each other?

Cecilia
My hubby was a bit your hubbys way when I started on this WOE in March 2020. Thankfully he’s come around a LOT since then BUT he’s still the one to go off it first because he’s tired of it.
Cooked dinners – give yourself more veggies – I use SO much cauli, broccoli & leeks & then open a small tin of new potatoes for him (as ordinary potatoes go green & poisonous too quickly). Also in the winter I use all the cauli leaves, broccoli stalks, leek offcuts + 2 chicken stock cubes & a few handfuls of fresh spinach leaves right at the end, then liquidise it with a wand blender to make 2+ litres of soup – If he can resist this delicious taste & goodness then he’s not at all like my hubby. Fish with veggies – yum!
Salads – add everything that he might enjoy. Really dress it up. If you have curries often then try making cauliflower rice to put them on. I doubt he’ll be able to tell. Thankfully hubby has come to enjoy this WOE over time & now will eat curries over freshly steamed veg, although he reserves the right to eat rice if he wants (once every 6 months or so lol).
Not sure where you live & that can make a difference as to what replies you have. We are from all over but reply to anyone, although it’s summer here now in UK & winter in Aus.
There are weekly threads & as much as 3 month ones. As you’ve done the diet before you can choose easily which you’d prefer. Join more than one if you want. We’re all a friendly bunch so will welcome you.

Cecilia
Forgot to answer about doing more damage coming off & onto this way of eating – Of Course you haven’t – many, many people on here have done exactly the same as you. We ALL come off it at some stage, often not totally BUT the carbs start creeping up & before you know it you’re back to almost your old ways. No-one on here will judge you at all.

Look on the heading Forums on the top click it & scroll down. You’ll see a list of topics that are active – the weekly one is on I think starting 21st july? The 3 month’ish one is in-betweeners – best to join in on 1 or more of these. You can also read all the recent posts.

Just join in with the weekly or 3 monthly threads rather than stay on this thread alone & you’ll receive bucket loads of help & advice.
Linda

Hi Cecilia, welcome to the site. I think you have done most damage by coming off the diet – it has put you back on the track of going into diabetes. But thats not your fault. It is hard and no-one on here pretends otherwise. We all have our ups and downs, gains and losses, rise in BG and good results. The secret of this plan for the diabetes – and that is more important than weight issues – is you know you are doing it for the best reason. Dont know if you are aware of the long term consequences of diabetes. Please look them up is you dont know. I is quite frightening. I am 17 years on insulin and over the last 6 years on this plan have greatly improved my life expectancy, reduced the risk of other complications and reduced my medication all round. Most important thing is to ditch the white, starchy carbs like bread, rice, pasta, breakfast cereals, processed foods. You will get ‘good’ carbs from other sources like fruit and veg.

Join us on one of the other group threads where you can pop up with questions as and when you want and there are other newbies needing help and oldies who have some of the answers.

Anyway, you know it works as you have done it before. You mustnt think all or nothing. You lost the weight by being very strict and the next step was to ditch the diet completely. There is an inbetween which can make life so much easier. Funny thing is now my hubby refuses potatoes etc when I ask him, says he has lost the taste for carbs.

Hi Cecilia ….. please don”t waste time and energy on beating yourself up about slipping back and regaining again. Rather, put energy into focusing on reducing your carbs and clawing back ground lost.

It’s a shame your OH isn’t onboard, as having carbie stuff around may make things tougher for you, but just stick to your guns and do it for you. Hopefully as he sees the progress you make, he might be more willing to join in. My OH isn’t fully committed, but after me following (on and off) this WoE for years, in the main he’s content to eat what I do now, with the occasional addition of some carbs

As SunshineGirl said, please do join in on other threads when you need advice, have questions or want to share successes or frustrations. The posters on the most active threads are a good mix of established BSDers and newcomers, so a warm welcome is always waiting and someone will always offer a response.

Cecelia, hope I didnt come across too harsh. Even coming off the diet will have slowed the diabetes down. Okay you are back to where you were before with the pre-diabetes so you have probably already done a lot of good. I wouldn’t bother about fasting at this stage, it is too severe. The only thing you could do is a short fast of around 12 hours, between your evening meal and breakfast. Just have as normal a diet as possible until you are back in the swing of it.

Thank you all for taking the time to write such thoughtful responses. So much good advice and sensible talk.

I did speak to my partner yesterday and told him he had to at the very least support me by trying to understand where I am. He listened and actually spent an hour reading ‘Fast 800’. I think he’s beginning to realise how important it is to avoid the risk of pre-diabetes becoming diabetes as far as i can.

Then He surprised me by saying he would try to join me this time, at least during the weekdays as well as doing what he could to support me generally. So we begin together, which is wonderful. I have taken all your advice on board and will follow it with support from this forum.

Thank you again.

Yaa great news. You can make this work. See you around and really looking forward to hearing about your journey. Call out if you need help/advise.

Welcome back Cecilia.
As sunshine-girl says …… cutting the carbs …. especially the white stuff and processed food is far more important for controlling blood sugar than weight loss per se.
When I started this way of eating 6 years ago my husband didn’t even realise I’d changed my diet! I’d just add a carb to his meal. About two years ago he also decided to go low carb as he was also pre-diabetic. It isn’t easy.
We also have a ‘foodie’ sort of life but you can still eat well, if not better, without the carbs. I’d make bolognese …. mine with courgetti his with pasta, cottage pie in two separate dishes his with mash mine with mashed cauliflower. Eating out was easy … I just substituted a carb for a green vegetable. In fact now I prefer curries over green vegetables like bok choi or broccoli than with rice.
I’m so pleased your partner ‘understands’ and even if he falls by the wayside occasionally you will find the strength to carry on ….. lower carb = blood sugar control.
Enjoy the journey!

Cecilia, there is a new weekly thread starting from today, with 26th July in the title. It’s a great place to find support and encouragement, so jump on there if you’re looking for company on your BSD journey. Hope we might see you there.

Thanks so much. You’ve all been more than helpful. Would love to stick around.